confidence 30 June 2008
I was with the Stockwellians last night and we got to talking about confidence. My sis in law is worried that they may be bringing the kids up to be too modest. I know what she means. You meet a lot of people who talk the talk – mind you, if they can’t walk the walk to back it up you’d hope they’d be found out and exposed as total charlatans (unless they are fabulously endearing and doing no harm or not getting too much in the way and entertaining with it and great to have around and somehow then it’s almost forgivable and not a sackable offence, if you know what I mean). I have always found that in London, particularly, you are sometimes required to talk yourself up and it’s not a thing that comes naturally to most (nice) people. But you can get a bit distracted by that talk and not be able to see the merit from the hype. I am glad that my nephew and nieces are slightly laid back and unpushy (oh, now, they have their moments of kicking up and off but not in a generally awful lookatmelookatmelookatme way).
My crisis is still hanging around like a bad smell but I am dealing with it in a slightly better way..I think. And I am edging forward with the work (though it’s all SHITE in my opinion – mind you, what do I know about anything at the moment?)
To underpin it all, I look like a battered woman right now. I keep bumping into awkwardly place packing boxes in the house and I bruise REALLY easily. The legs and arms are WOUNDED. It’s just more of the self-harm we should have spotted when I had that disaster with the tanning lotion last week – that was the start of it…But, hey, that’s also that bitch Hindsight, easy for that to be 20-20 vision when the thing is done. Duh.
