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anglo 29 September 2010

It can’t have escaped the attetion of the whole world now that the Irish Prime minister seems to have been under the weather while being interviewed on radio one morning during his party’s annual conference – everyone from Leno in the States and HAVE I GOT NEWS FOR YOU in the UK have had a pop.
Meanwhile the government is in session again and the nation is being told that the bailout of Anglo Irish Bank (which we now collectively and reluctantly own) will cost many more billions than at first thought. Yes, I did say BILLIONS there…
SO this morning a cement mixer lorry, with ANGLO TOXIC BANK painted on it, was driven into the gates of Leinster House (the main Government building) as a protest. Cue many many jokes on twitter and beyond – “Maybe Cowen ordered a mixer for the whole cabinet!!” said one “So you get arrested if you crash a truck into the Dail but not if you crash the entire economy?” said another.
One person was delighted that there was an actual gate involved in what is now dubbed CEMENTGATE.
Another opined the politicians ‘will be stuck between a rock and a hard place when it sets’.
And a local paper in Clare announced ‘MORTAR ATTACK ON LEINSTER HOUSE’.
We live in interesting times, my friends.

injured 27 September 2010

There is an ad on my email site that frightens the living daylights out of me on many levels, and often. It features Esther Rantzen. For those of you unfamiliar with her, she’s a tv presenter who used to be huge in those public have-you-got-a-consumer-complaint tv shows and then she did a bit of everything else, she even ran for political office in the last UK election. Now, she’s doing internet adverts. The first time I saw this (and every time since) a still photo of Esther popped up most unexpectedly from below the screen, smiling, with her ultra white protruding teeth stunning in a scary way, while opposite a question that I read too quickly asked ‘have you been MURDERED?’ When I finished screaming, I realised it had asked ‘have you been INJURED?’ though I was no less spooked. I’m not sure it’s a great ad – for example, I couldn’t tell you what company it’s for as that has never impinged on me. (I rest my case).

orbs 26 September 2010

The orbs stayed under wraps – for this much thanks and, indeed, some relief on my part. I had a wonderful time in Devon, hooking up with ex work colleagues and also attending one of the great weddings – my lovely mates Dan and Ella are now hitched. Everything about the day was idyllic from the setting in a gorgeous church in Throwleigh to the sunny weather to the doo apres and the sheer happiness of the couple. I also met a four month old whippet pup that I have fallen horribly in love with – she is SO beautiful and a fabulous blue/grey colour, like the much missed Geezee, my beloved cat who departed a year ago. We had lashings of champagne and cupcakes, a hog roast with all of the trimmings and energetic dancing. I left before the jumping fully clad into the pool began…again for this much gratitude to my mind for going ‘time to leave, Pauline, you’re about to keel over’. Huge thanks to Simon and Clare for putting us up and putting up with us. Top notch all round. Needless to say I was entirely reluctant to return to ‘real life’ today – it ain’t all it’s cracked up to be…
Richard accompanied me in all of the weekend’s adventures and it must be noted that he is The Best.
I am a lucky woman.

hedge 24 September 2010

those of you who have followed this blog for a few years will know that me going to Devon means unless I find a hedgerow on the top of a hill i may not have coverage…so info of disgrace and adventure may be slow to disseminate…but continue to watch this space…

south 23 September 2010

I am south bound and over excited about it. Tis Devon, my friends, and the first time for me to return since I filmed the wonderful JAM AND JERUSALEM there. Further thrill is that I shall be reunited with some of those involved and visit several places where, quite frankly, some of my usual crimes were committed – laughing, drinking, dancing and the flashing of the orbs to anyone who cared to see them…this time out Himself will be with me so I may only show the orbs to him, unless there is a formal request for them from another of my regular viewers (ms jennifer saunders often goads me into such an action…) We have all been warned…

punch 22 September 2010

I may be an old dog (or was that ‘bitch’ someone meant when they called me that!) but I can learn new tricks from time to time. I now know how to pull a punch on camera which is a skill gratefully welcomed by any that are to be on the receiving end of such a thing. The occasional new word can still gets purchase in my ever-diminishing brain – good news for a novelist like myself. I have learned to visit the Genius Bar of the Apple Store in the Arndale when the laptop gets all too much – so far the lovely Chris has been tortured by my truly lame problems and he is very good at disguising his surprise at just how little I know. Today he got my entourage email system working again by sacking off my original account and setting up another. And he made access easier to the site I was using…BUT…because they all look too too new to me I am presently a confused dawg…I guess I’ll get the hang of them all but so far I’m not LOVING them…the admitting of which is pulling no punches, I guess…

dentists 20 September 2010

Strange how a mini trend can strike up – bit like proving a pattern to chaos i suppose – at work it’s dental problems. and i so don’t want to join the selection of fine women who are in some agony with their fangs right now. i used to be easy about going to get my teeth seen to but as the years have gone on i got more queasy about the needles and i haven’t been in (this is shocking) about 15 years…at this stage i’ll need to go to a hygienist to have them cleaned before going to a dentist at a different practise for the work that needs to be done – kind of like tidying away before a cleaner comes to your house…ridiculous but it happens…

benny 19 September 2010

Although the Pope has left London there’re still lots of helicopters buzzing about. He’s making apologies all round during his visit to the UK for just about everything and it’s interesting to note that the idea of a poisoned chalice was first mooted many centuries ago by a saint…Saint Benedict…

nuts 17 September 2010

So many mad things happening over the last while – a fake TOGO football team turns up recently to play Bahrain (Bahrain win 3 nil and can’t quite understand hoe the Togonese national team is so poor) but they weren’t official (the Togo lads). A member of the mighty Electric Light Orchestra is killed by a rolling/stray hay bale (reminiscent of the drummers in Spinal Tap, the mockumentary, who all died in bizarre ways) and the Irish Prime Minister has to make a public apology to the nation following a particularly underwhelming radio interview, has to explain himself to a golfer he mimicked and promises to behave himself better (in public at least) in future. 2010, the year that just keeps on giving…

interview 16 September 2010

So, there’s a big brouhaha in Ireland at the moment because our Prime Minister did a morning radio interview while a little challenged the other day – he’d been at his Party conference and, well, partied till 3am (pints drunk, songs sung and impressions did, by all accounts) and then he spoke to the nation a little under par a few hours later. Reminds me of the days of Yeltsin in Russia. He once famously didn’t get off his aeroplane in Shannon to meet our Irish political dignitaries because he was ‘unwell’. The hazards of being in the public eye, eh? – everyone is JUST WAITING to get that photo of the drunken slip up, or the compromising position – proof of being all too too human…

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