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welcome to the official website of Pauline McLynn

backcomb 11 November 2010

We have a new product at work called Backcomb in a Bottle – it’s basically a massively bodifying hairspray in a VEH nice bit of packaging. Rachel Bryant, my wonderful make-up artist (soon to be 30 and celebrating that in some styleeee this weekend) swears it makes a difference BUT crucially it does not ACTUALLY back comb the hair…that still needs doing…so it is not perhaps a TOTAL backcomb in a bottle…It reminds me of a friend who is appalled that people buy already mashed potatoes or turnip – she once asked ‘how lazy do you have to be not to mash your own spuds?’ to which I had to admit ‘lazy enough to be me…’

moped 9 November 2010

Many years ago (a number of decades, if I’m honest) I got myself a moped to nip around Dublin. It was a Suzuki LOVE and it’s top speed was 39 mph, though I very much doubt it ever achieved that. I love that lil 2-stroke engine. My cat, Mutt, fitted basket and all onto a footstep, whenever he needed going to the vets (he didn’t love those trips, mind you). If it had a fault at all it was that my hair got VEH VEH flattened by the helmet (And with the tragic shaggy perm of the time I looked a right sight after any journey). However, shortly after I got it, well, less than week into our partnership, the bike broke down by the canal while I was dashing to work one morning. I’m not very technical and had no idea what to do to fix it so I walked it to a service station further along the road where I discovered that the fault was entirely mine…I had neglected to put petrol in the dern thing. And this is a lesson in magic, really. Yesterday I left the power cable for this laptop in my dressing room at work and so, when I came to give the world of my musings, I found that the magic was not available to me – there was no power, no petrol in the engine if you will. The magic was broken, it has ceased to be, it was ex-magic. Lesson noted and learned. That is all.

philly 7 November 2010

The Irish Taoiseach (pronounced Teeshock – really) ie our prime minister, has made a speech saying there is light at the end of the tunnel for the country – so, after the initiative announced last week to give cheese to the needy for Christmas, cue all sorts of Philadelphia Light jokes…(and, I’ll say it again, of all things to gift the nation…CHEESE – a comedy sketch classic – I would laugh if I still wasn’t so stumped by it all)

cheese 5 November 2010

The Irish Government has announced its initiative to help those in need this Christmas: it is to give them free cheese – no, I’m not kidding, it’s true. Cheese. It’s like we’re living in an extended comedy sketch…without gags/laughs/integrity/dignity. I am so gobsmacked I don’t have words to explain how I feel about that so WTF?!? will have to do for now…

spam 4 November 2010

I seem to have a fairly effective spam filter on one of my email addresses now, in as much as it collects those mails that offer me codeine and viagra and so on. It doesn’t delete them on my behalf but collects them in a file called SPAM and every so often I remember I’ve got it and I bin the lot and never once have I seen anything in the title of those emails that leads me to believe that they’re anything but junk, so there’s never been a need to open any to check. But I wonder if it would also sideline an email that offered, say, spam, as in the horrid, supposedly meat-based luncheon sausage? It SHOULD, surely…

kingfisher 3 November 2010

Well now, the kingfisher bird is making a return because waterways are cleaner and they breed very quickly. Delighted to hear it as they are just gorgeous – such beautiful and colourful plumage and features. AND to tie in with my new of red lippy yesterday, did you know that the female has a bright lower bill called a ‘lipstick’ – oh yes, random scientific and biological knowledge will be dispensed through this site from time to time.
The first time my mother brought me to London we visited the Natural History Museum and I wasn’t aware, or even struck by, how vast it was at the time. When we were leaving I told her I’d love to see a hummingbird and though she really didn’t think I’d succeed, what with the number of birds on show in that particular section, she let me off on my quest (tagging along too to keep tabs on me) but some ‘homing’ instinct took over and my eye was attuned to spotting the tiny creature and I did. It was everything I hoped – tiny and wonderful – obviously the trouble with the one in the museum was that it was dead (!).
I think it would be a lovely thing to see either a live kingfisher or hummingbird in their habitat and perhaps some day I will. I hope I’ll live in a time when we won’t lose too many species because of man’s selfish expansion and neglect of the planet.
The Irish Natural History Museum is known locally as The Dead Zoo, by the way.

noah 2 November 2010

Mr Noah is needed in Manchester right now to build many arks – I have NEVER seen rain like this – tis BIBLICAL – and I’m Irish, and west of Ireland too, so I know a thing or two about rain.
To combat it all I went to the theatre tonight and wore a VERY red lipstick as if I was half my age – I base this remark on an article my sis-in-law read recently saying no woman over 25 should wear a bright red lippy – feck that, even if it’s true…and anyway who made such a ‘rule’…and does it also apply to men over 25? If I get any reports to the effect of ‘she shouldn’t have worn that lipstick, she scared the actors’ or the like, I’ll (reluctantly) let ye know. Is there nothing left to us ladies of the late 40s?

bloat 1 November 2010

SO, everything I bought on Saturday, while being all ‘adult’ and ignoring the bills that are stalking me, looks HIDEOUS now. All too tight and that situation is not improving as the craving for The Carb has me in its clutches…this, too, BETTER pass because my patience with all things 2010 is fading faster than a very fast thing…
The bills ares till with me too – a reminder of the great saying ‘I started out with nothing, and I still have most of that.’

retail 31 October 2010

Some days just lend themselves to shopping. On Friday I found myself in a retail park outside Sheffield hunting down a jacket for a friend who hadn’t bought said item when she should have. I found it (against all odds) and it’s waiting for her in my hallway now. But though I tried my best to find something for me too it wasn’t to be..just not one of THOSE days. However, yesterday was a festival of finding things and I spent way too much money that I didn’t have (with plenty of encouragement from my sis-in-law, Rebecca). This is on the back of the news that I owe the tax man a lot of money (and therefore should be saving wildly for that) and a lovely threatening note form the council, some of which is written in red (not good). SO, I answered those events in an adult way (ahem) and really enjoyed the inappropriate retail therapy. I will look lovely in my new threads while being utterly broke and perhaps facing jail – grand, so. I am 48 years old…

opium 29 October 2010

I spent a lovely night tonight with the people I regard as my in-laws – bill and yvonne who live in Longsight in manc – and when I was leaving I had a right hug of yvonne and she smelled lovely…Opium is her perfume and it never smelled like that on me but I did have occasion to remember that the first theatrical tour I ever went on I declared I was gonna save lotsa money to see me through the months ahead and the Old Hands quite rightly said I should splurge on SOMETHING I wanted that I wouldn’t ever get while I was signing-on and it was a bottle of Opium perfume and they were so right I SO enjoyed it for ages after the well paid job ended = good advice!

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